MachoPoni: A Prance With Death by Lotus Rose

Author:Lotus Rose
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Fantasy
ISBN: 9781933929798
Publisher: Spunk Goblin Press
Published: 2009-03-26T07:00:00+00:00

It's such a pleasure to say,

Two cuds for you!!

Two cuds for yoooooooo!!!"

In one motion the cuddlebears all rose onto their hind legs, standing upright, holding their front legs out, baring their tummies of quills, ready to pierce Macho with their horrible cuddles that kill!

Macho really wanted to pounce and bludgeon TooCool with at least one solid blow, but he got too scared. He turned to gallop away, but then he stopped. He could have easily outrun the cuddlebears, but then he wouldn't be able to cross the bridge and continue on his journey to rescue Dust! He had to figure out a way past the cuddlebears.

He yelled out, "Wait!"

He thought for a moment, then an idea popped into his head. He turned around to face the cuddlebears, who were watching him curiously.

Macho tried his best to sound condescending, as he said, "You say you like my ball, but you sissies look like you wouldn't know what to do with a ball if you had one.…" Then he laughed mockingly. "You have no balls!"

TooCool, who seemed to speak for the whole group, was outraged. "That's not true! We'd know what to do with it, and we'd play with it a lot better than you!"

All the cuddlebears went back down onto all fours.

Macho's plan was working. It seemed you could always get a guy to act foolishly if you insulted his pride. Macho smirked, then said, "Well, how about we play a game of hoofball and see about that? If I win, I keep my ball and you'll let me go forward in my journey. If you win, you still let me go forward, but you can keep the ball. Unless you're too scared you'll lose? Is it a deal?" The cuddlebears glanced at each other, then nodded and agreed. Macho nudged the ball forward and began walking toward them. "So where do you usually play your games with your…rocks?"

TooCool said they usually played right there in front of the bridge. They said they didn't know how to play hoofball and were very curious about it.

Macho explained the rules of the game to them. It involved running back and forth, kicking the ball with your hooves and kicking the ball into a net. The cuddlebears didn't have nets, so they used stones to indicate the goals. They didn't have hooves either, so they would use their feet.

Macho asked them what sorts of games they usually played if they didn't know how to play hoofball.

"Well," said TooCool, "we have a game called rock roll, where we take the roundest rock we can find, even though it’s usually a little lopsided. Then we take turns. One team rolls the rock from one end of the field to the other, while the other team calls them names. When they reach the end of the field, that's one point, then, they switch, and the other team rolls the rock. They keep doing that until one team gives up. Most of the time it's a tie, but sometimes a team wins.

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